I'm currently having a mixture of feelings now. I have been feeling sad, happy and down at the same time. So how do you explain that?

My cousin brother left for Doha, Qatar today at around 7 am. My family except me were sending him off at the airport as early as 5.30 am. I am not able to make it as I need my sleep and I need to be at work at 8.30.

I slept late too yesterday as my family came home late from visiting him at his house. I would love very much to see him off but I cant help it. Anyway, I have been quite close to him and I felt his absence this morning.

As I was getting ready for work, I kept imagining his face and how he would have reacted seeing all his family members and relatives seeing him off.

I was told by my sister that he waved goodbye to all before the entrace gate and never to turn around again. He must be crying at that moment. He told me on the night before that he might look relaxed but he isnt actually. He was devastated having to leave his family and relative to persue for work.

He must be feeling happy at the same time that his career has reached its peak, I suppose. At this moment, he should still be on board the plane. He must be thinking how his family is doing right now.

I'm beginning to miss him. Missing all the moments that we cracked jokes together with my siblings. Missing all the moments spend with him. He'll be back after a year of working there and might be off again to Doha.

To my beloved brother Joe,
I hope you are coping well with your feelings right now. I really understand your feelings of having to leave your loved ones behind but that's the path you chose. It's OK, time will heal all that and you will be back to normal. When you have settled down there, you are going to create an email account and email me right? Do so OK. I cant wait to show you my blog and what I have written about you. Hope to hear from you soon. Take care dearest.

From your beloved sister,
Hetti

I miss ya brother. =(